Why Do We Fall In Love With One Person And Not Someone Else?
People are a fascinating conglomeration of attitudes, beliefs, desires and aspirations. Understanding why we fall in love with a man or woman and not with others is a challenge that has caught the attention of psychologists for a long time. Emotions take root in our brain in a way that is difficult to understand, but it is they that enter in an implicit and almost magical way into ourselves, our personality and our desires.
Attraction is sometimes based on needs we are not aware of; in aspirations and desires that, at the outset, seem defined in one type of person and not in another.
Let’s see in more detail…
the passionate brain
When we question these processes that happen in our brain when we are in love, magic loses some of its charm to move to a cooler world, where we are determined by chemistry, by a wonderful mix of neurotransmitters capable of causing us such sensation. known as “being in the clouds”. Endorphin, enkephalin and phenylethylanine are responsible for our euphoria and happiness; they are what give us an injection of positive emotions. However, what activates these processes, which causes our brain to focus on one type of person and not another?
1st Theory: We Fall in Love with Family Similarity
Sometimes we are attracted to people we feel good with because they remind us, in some way, of our parents. This brings us security and confidence. We are attracted to them because they are familiar to us, and being with these people gives us a pleasant feeling of kinship.
2nd Theory: We Fall in Love with Correspondence
Another theory is that of correspondence, according to scientists. When we fall in love, the fact that we share similar experiences and have gone through the same things, have similar tastes and values, weighs heavily . It is a good way to choose a partner for our life in all these aspects, which makes our existence easier and more exciting. It’s another kind of very enriching affinity.
3rd Theory: We Fall in Love with Admiration
Sometimes admiration for someone translates into love. It is this person who serves us as a mirror and shows us virtues, aspirations or dimensions that we have always wanted for ourselves but that, for some reason, we are not able to. It is here, for example, that attractions to people who are very different from us appear: sometimes we are attracted to self-assured, outgoing and enterprising people, while we are more insecure and a little shy. Opposites attract because, deep down, they complement and fulfill each other’s needs.
4th Theory: We Fall in Love with the Matter of Chemistry and Glands
Many studies assume the importance of so-called pheromones. They are substances secreted by some glands present in the lips, armpits and neck, thanks to an organ called the vomeronasal, independent of the sense of smell. It is an odor that creates sensations, something unique in each person and that, in some way, also determines us.
These are the most common theories that are established when talking about passion and explaining why we fall in love with a certain type of person and not with another. Whether they are the right people or not, time will tell us and we will realize it ourselves, when this blind phase of passion loses its intensity, its clouds… making us see reality.
