Why Are Compliments Important In Love Relationships?

Praise in love relationships is important as a sign of that much-needed little dose of admiration. They are emotional caresses, validations and daily reinforcements of affection. When they are part of the honesty of the speech, there are few ingredients that best reinforce the bond that unites two people.

Let’s admit that we all feel energized when we are recognized by other people. The problem in couple relationships is that, many times, we fall into a routine, we take everything for granted and forget the daily affections. However, these types of dynamics are essential in any relational bond. They serve to reinforce, to rekindle love and gain security in what was built between the two…

Praise in love relationships? Yes please

Save sum. Saving up on expenses and living a more austere life can be good for a family’s finances. However, if there is an offer in which we sin as conservatives, it is in the praise in love relationships. Emotions gain strength when we put them into words. The ways in which we can transmit our affection and love to someone are multiple; no need to wait for a special occasion…

John Gottman is one of the leading psychologists when it comes to the psychological analysis of love relationships. Your book

In happy ties, the praise/criticism ratio is five to one in favor of the first . In other words, in our relationship with someone, occasional discussions and criticisms will never be completely removed, it is true, but the small erosion they can produce is compensated by recognition.

The behavior rewarded, the best validation

“Thanks for that, I’m glad you’ve been doing that, you’re great at that point, you’re the best at that…”. Rewarded behavior is one of the best compliments in relationships.

It doesn’t matter that each of us has a good sense of self-efficacy. Knowing that the person we love appreciates and values ​​what we do comforts us, makes us feel good. So let’s try not to take everything the other party does for granted. Let’s try to value each gesture.

Physical attraction and praise in love relationships

In fact, compliments about physical appearance also count, they’re also necessary and we value them. Studies like the one carried out at Southern Methodist University in Dallas, United States, show something interesting. Many women are uncomfortable receiving compliments from strangers, but they appreciate their partners telling them they are attractive.

That compliment, that comment or that positive adjective is not received in the same way if the partner, for example, does not value other aspects, such as their way of being, their abilities, values, behaviors, etc.

Praise and low self-esteem

Praise in love relationships is especially important for people with low self-esteem. While it is true that when starting a relationship with someone, it is a priority that self-concept and self-esteem are always high, this is not always true.

There are those who feel besieged by doubts. There are many who suffer from an excess of fears (of not being loved, wanted, admired, etc.). So there are times when praise in relationships becomes an obsessive and unhealthy need.

If they are always needed to allay insecurity, fears and doubts, we are very likely to find forced and even false comments. Works like the one carried out at the University of California talk about this.

What are the best compliments we can receive and offer our partner?

Praise in relationships is a daily gift full of meaning. However, for them to take effect, honesty needs to come into play. A false compliment can give us the feeling that the other is trying to make fun of us or inspire the idea that he doesn’t really know us.

In that sense, details are essential. Support the meaning of the compliment with specific references. “ I love the patience you have with kids, how you try to explain what they have to do even though you’re so tired.”

In conclusion, let’s not skimp on the wonderful art of emotional validation, positive reinforcement, and authentic recognition of the other. Caring for love is a daily work from which we will always reap the rewards.