Fight The Feeling Of Loneliness With Wisdom
Loneliness can be destructive and cruel if we turn it into our enemy. But the society we live in does not help us to look at it differently. Since childhood, they put in our minds the belief that being alone is a negative thing, something that differentiates failures from those who are not. However, in case you find yourself with loneliness, what to do? Are you going to stop living life and enjoying it just because you have no one by your side?
The solution to all this lies in us, but we don’t see it because we have to do something very important: to do actions that, out of inertia, seem to be done only with other people. But, above all, it is necessary to free ourselves from this belief that loneliness is negative when in fact it can be one of the most enriching experiences we can have.
loneliness is a gift
We often do real silly things to avoid being alone. We jump from relationship to relationship, we do things for other people so as not to “lose” them even if we don’t really like them… In short, a series of attitudes we perform so that others don’t run away from our lives, because being alone is not something we conceive of as acceptable.
Have you ever gone to the movies alone? Have you ever been to dinner at your favorite restaurant without anyone else? How many times have you given up an idea because no one wanted to go along? If you stop to think, we often limit ourselves and do not enjoy what we like when we feel like it, because there is no one by our side. This is one of the biggest nonsense to do.
It’s true that there will be people around you who will look weird, maybe your family will say you’re “crazy” for going alone to a bar or a nightclub. This will encourage you to do what they say, and it will feed that erroneous belief that you haven’t been able to completely eliminate from your head. But, if you’re true to yourself, if you don’t sacrifice your delight by having a date, then you’ll discover a world of possibilities.
Of course we are afraid of rejection, of feeling inadequate. But, who knows if in this place, suddenly, you don’t find someone else? Not that you go for that purpose, you need to enjoy it. But anything can happen, because even if you don’t believe it, there are people who do things alone and who enjoy this solitude without caring what others think.
we don’t need to depend on anyone
Our fear of loneliness is the result of an intense inertia of depending on others. Depending on our family, our partner, our friends not only to do things, but sometimes even to live. When we face loneliness, we are free. But then comes the fear of letting go, of not being tied to what gave us a sense of security.
It makes you dizzy to realize that we are on a tightrope where we are not accompanied by anyone, where we only have ourselves. Fears cannot be ignored, we will have no choice but to listen to ourselves. We had been avoiding this for a long time, diving into crowds and listening to superficial conversations.
But in solitude, we discover the wonderful feeling that we are responsible for our own lives and that it doesn’t matter what norms society has imposed and all those unwritten laws that tell us how we should live. At this time when we are alone where our hands shake because we have to take the reins of our own lives. This makes us afraid. How many times did we think we were free, when in fact we were heavily dependent on others?
Make no mistake. Loneliness hurts because it confronts us with our greatest fears. However, the pain is always transient, it never lasts longer than necessary. Loneliness drives us to be ourselves, to let go of all those stupid beliefs and norms that we took for granted when, in fact, they were holding us back.
It’s not bad to be alone, even less to enjoy alone. Ignore those who make fun of you, as they add to the temptation to go back to the beginning, where dependence on others overwhelmed you. If loneliness presents itself in your life, don’t deny it, don’t try to avoid it by accumulating empty people who don’t bring you anything. Embrace it, accept it and, above all, enjoy it. Because thanks to it you will get rich, discover yourself and, without a doubt, grow.
Images courtesy of Junne Leloo.
